Tired

Yes, I'm tired. Tired of this current life of mine, tired of women, tired of politics, tired of working, tired of prepping, tired of most everything.

Tired of this current life of mine.
   I cannot find a decent job. I make decent money (for this day anyway)  but the hours suck. Open, close, mid-day they all get mixed up until I don't know what day it is. Broke all the time. I don't mean got a 1000 bucks broke , I mean I've got 10 dollars broke. Lonely all the time. Can't afford to go anywhere do anything, buy anything. And cannot find another job. Constant pain and discomfort. I have to work just to survive but that cuts me out of disability. Now, If I have disability, I can get a job, If I have a job I cannot get disability. FUCK! I make insurance payments yet cannot afford the out of pocket expense or put back enough money to live on while I'm off work for surgery.
Cannot afford to make repairs to my truck or my Harley. so the truck gets ignored and the Harley sits, waiting on parts and repairs, I have given up most of my hobbies due to physical problems. Basically, I work and go home and watch TV. And mow because I have too

Tired of women.
   Yep, fed up to here with them. The love of my life divorced me with no notice, no discussion, no nothing just gone. She took the house I paid for with MY 401K and  I did ALL the work on. She will take 1/2 of my union retirement. And she took one of my best friends as her new husband. I have had one date in the last year and she ranted for 2.5 hours about her ex. I cut dinner short and dumped her at her door, I recently asked a co-worker to go to a concert with me. I got the standard female response...Uhm, I don't know, let me think about it.  I cannot get any hits on ANY online dating site. I treat women good, respect them, honor them, look after them and protect them but I guess that is not good enough so, the hell with them.

Tired of politics
    They all tell the same story. And they are ALL LIARS! It's high time for the revolution from my perspective. The soap box and ballot box have failed so it's high time for the cartridge box. Time for a change. They had it right back in 1861.

Tired of working.
Do not get me wrong, I am one of those folks who really like to work. But, I do not like working for no gain. As in, I'm stagnating. I do not like retail at all. I do not make enough dough to do anything, go anywhere, do anything. I work in constant pain, and I'm under the effect of a handful of medication all the time.

Tired of prepping.
   I have prepped for years. Have put vast amounts of dollars into it. Yet now I'm alone, in a big city and no prospect for a bug out location or a group to join. I have had to eat most of my prep foods just to survive recently. I cannot afford to buy ammo anymore so I do not shoot anymore. At this time prepping seems pointless. I'm alone in a major city with nowhere to go to. So what's the fucking point? Shoot until I'm out of ammo then die in place I guess.

Tired of Most everything.

Nothing has any flavor anymore. Dull, lifeless. I have a type A personality. I like dangerous hobbies, Shooting, driving fast, motorcycling, biker bars, pyrotechnics, explosions, making things out metal and wood, riding ATV's.  Since the old lady split, nothing brings me happiness. Life has a fog over it.
The News is a drag, no REAL news, no REAL investigations. I'm tired of groups trying to remove all monuments to the soldiers and leaders of the South from the time of Lincolns War. Like the jackasses at the Washington and Lee College that had the Confederate flags removed from Robert E. Lees Tomb. For crying out loud, he was a major General for the South and fought for the Confederacy! And he was a founder  of that college. AND those jackasses CHOSE to go to THAT college.  Now dickheads are trying to remove Jefferson Davis's statue from the University of Texas. Let's see, Texas was a member of the Confederacy, right? And Jeff was President of said Confederacy, correct? Yet these misguided fools choose to ignore the fact that most major Eastern colleges were either founded by or had the land granted by, slave importers, ignore the fact that Lincoln was a liar, a murderer, destroyed the Constitution and started a war just to expand the federal governments power. I guess I'm just tired of revisionist history. It seems that a lot of stuff pisses me off anymore and I get little enjoyment from anything.

I'm hoping that my outlook will change, that I can improve my income, that my health issues will get better. I'm not hoping for a change in my outlook on women. They can thank themselves for that.

Saturday Fluff

Take this bitches...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BRRR! In More Ways Than One.

It's cool and rainy here in the Heartland. Really, this time of the year it's supposed to be freaking HOT! Normally it's in the 90's and 100's, right now it's 66 degrees, raining and windy. The windows are open, the curtains are blowing and I've got a delightful chill. I just need a warm body to share this weather with.
I had one lined up, a woman I have know for many years. The two of us have always had an attraction for each other. When she found out that my wife had left me she started texting me certain something's that really heated up the airwaves. This has went on for a couple of months now and she has even left her husband. After several aborted attempts to meet up for a couple days I finally had a weekend off that coincided with her days off. Way fucking cool! I called her to confirm the weekend and she told me "Uh, I'm getting used to being by myself so never mind" or words to that effect. Ask what I think about woman at this time, go ahead ask me. Strike Two.

Hot

Summer has finally hit and it looks like we have another hot muggy day ahead of us. It makes me think of the beach.

I'm Still Around

Well Irish wanted to know how I was doing so here it goes. With all that is on my mind, bearing down on my shoulders and with a busted heart to boot, I'm not doing bad. Yeah I have some anger and a lot of frustration too. But in the end things will work out, I hope. I still have not found a place to keep my Harley, tools and outdoor gear. I spoke to an individual I have done business with in the past about renting some garage space for non commercial use. The price wasn't bad, if you wanted to run a business out of the place or you had a good income. On a low income personal use basis however, the price was far to high. I am going to pitch an idea to the man about splitting the space in two as well as splitting the price in half. That would give me a powered garage to keep the bike and other items in, a space to use for a workshop and a space to use for vehicle repairs and whatnot. I need to re-evaluate my ever changing budget and see if I can find a budget line for this garage.

My soon to be ex-wife and I are trying to work out the details of her piss poor decision so we can refrain from using a lawyers at multiple hundreds of dollars an hour. It does get rancorous at times but progress is being made. If you can call splitting up after 30 years, progress.

If I can find a place for my things, I'd be doing OK, that's it just OK. I must find a way to trim my monthly budget but it's already pretty skinny. Do I cut back on the grocery budget or quit seeing a doctor? It's those kind of decisions that fuel my anger and desolation.

So there it is, I'm still here, just got a lot on my mind anymore. Rest assured, I am still reading all you inspiring writings and they lift my spirits. So keep up the good work!

On a brighter note, my son and his family came into town for a couple days. we spent a lot of time together last night and then had a nice lunch at the local barbeque joint. Man last night I had so much fun playing with my 18 month old grand daughter. She is a riot! Happy, smart, cunning and cute as a bugs ear to boot. My mother, her great grannie, gave her a bag of chocolate filled Vienna wafer type cookies last night. After she chewed on a couple she sat down at her mommas foot and while great grannie and I spied on her, she proceeded to open every single cookie, one at a time and eat the chocolate filling. She would then place the empty cookie slabs to the side, give a furtive upward glance at her mom, to see if she had been caught and then proceed to the next cookie. Needless to say, a half hour later her spring unwound! I chased her, flew her around the room and had a good time in general for about two hours. When they left for the evening the little girl was still going strong!

Life Sucks The Big One

I'm sorry for the lack postings but things have been very interesting for me lately. And not in a good way. A couple weeks ago my employer came to me saying that my performance in the computer area was not up to snuff and I had made some mistakes on a certain federal form. After a friendly discussion we agreed that due to the interactions and side effects of the several drugs I take things would not really change. So we agreed that we would part ways at the end of January. So, since that time I have been looking for a job in every available moment. The fateful day arrived and we parted on good terms. On the way home I got a call from Chery Pie. Not a good one either. I come home to a half emptied house. We spent a good hour and a half on the phone with no real progress.
So for the last several days, my mind reeling, I get slowly stewed every night so that I can at least get some sleep. During the day if I can find something to stay busy with, things are somewhat OK. But when the shadows grow long and the light starts to fade my mind goes into overdrive. Reasons escape me, question arise over and over again. A snippet of an old Hank junior song seems tailor written for this moment."... I can't, eat I can't sleep, I can't watch no love scenes on TV........."
Yesterday, we had a frank face to face conversation. It went well. But it seems this one is going to take some time.
 And that's all I'll say about that.

I do have a new best friend though...

 

More Things I like

Just a few...


Colt 1911 Pistols

 

German Shephards

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sexy Women

 

 

 

 

 

Thirty Carbines

 

 

 

 

 

Rhodesian Ridgeback Dogs

 

 

 

 

 

 

Good Looking Women in Bib Overalls

 

 

 

 

 

 

Old Savage Pistols

 

 

 

 

 

 

Simple Log Cabins

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And of course redheaded women

The Glory Of Travel

On our journey from Missouri to Virginia via Texas, we saw all the usual sights that can be found during travel by air. As for me I saw many things that made me realise the glory that can be found when traveling. I just want to thank all the women that had their bouncy bits shelved and on display this weekend. My oh my, what nature has provided to some of the fairer sex is truly remarkable.